Saturday, January 26, 2008
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Goodbye Elusive.. you will be missed
at 6am this morning, i received an sms from mr ang, the chinese security guard who also shares the same worries and angst over the ailing cat.
"the cat died, i'm so sorry."
i stoned for a minute. i do feel relieved in some ways as i know Elusive is free from her suffering now. then i started tearing, because of my own attachment to her.
Elusive was lying in almost the same spot i left her last evening. There were 2 blobs of poo on the t-shirt. perhaps she has been constipated all this while she must have felt good when she finally could poo.
uncle zain, the malay security guard, who has been her caregiver for the past 3 years, dug a hole in the ground behind the room where she died and buried her this morning. he clothed her in the school shirt and buttoned up all the way and only the face was revealed. he tucked her in nicely, bundled up, in the malay way, he says. Her body was already stiff. uncle zain said he couldnt sleep last nite. his mind kept wandering to the cat. he also knew that she wouldnt make it. a fellow cat-lover colleague saw Elusive last evening. we were both stroking her. at one point, i got up to check to see if the "coast was clear" of the P, my friend said Elusive lifted up her head and tried to see where i went. i almost cried when i heard this.
as this school busy and burden herself with all the unnecessary work, a sweet little cat left this world. unnoticed by the all-very-important tight-ass "educators" who view strays as trash and pest. unmoved by her suffering, untouched by her spirit.
will take a picture of her "tomb" later.
thank you all for the well-wishes.
i know i'm not alone.
"the cat died, i'm so sorry."
i stoned for a minute. i do feel relieved in some ways as i know Elusive is free from her suffering now. then i started tearing, because of my own attachment to her.
Elusive was lying in almost the same spot i left her last evening. There were 2 blobs of poo on the t-shirt. perhaps she has been constipated all this while she must have felt good when she finally could poo.
uncle zain, the malay security guard, who has been her caregiver for the past 3 years, dug a hole in the ground behind the room where she died and buried her this morning. he clothed her in the school shirt and buttoned up all the way and only the face was revealed. he tucked her in nicely, bundled up, in the malay way, he says. Her body was already stiff. uncle zain said he couldnt sleep last nite. his mind kept wandering to the cat. he also knew that she wouldnt make it. a fellow cat-lover colleague saw Elusive last evening. we were both stroking her. at one point, i got up to check to see if the "coast was clear" of the P, my friend said Elusive lifted up her head and tried to see where i went. i almost cried when i heard this.
as this school busy and burden herself with all the unnecessary work, a sweet little cat left this world. unnoticed by the all-very-important tight-ass "educators" who view strays as trash and pest. unmoved by her suffering, untouched by her spirit.
will take a picture of her "tomb" later.
thank you all for the well-wishes.
i know i'm not alone.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Not looking good
brought Elusive back to the little room before I left today. Laid some old t-shirt for her to lie on. she was really quite limp by then. stroked her and comforted her. told her to let go if she is really is in pain. not sure if she is really in great pain or not. she seemed relaxed and just really really very tired. i'm sure she is tired, all her life, living as a stray, exposed to all the harsh elements of the environment. she is a really beautiful tabby girl with gorgeous stripes. stayed with her for a long time, just stroking her little head. i've a pretty strong feeling that she would go tonight, that we would find a lifeless body in the room tomorrow morning. the poor baby...
Elusive in her healthier days
taken some months back.
when this girl would scoot off before i can even say hi.
when this girl would scoot off before i can even say hi.
she is found! but in a much worse condition
dear all,
A good to news to share. Elusive is found! she has been in the room all this while!! would u believe it?? today the uncle smelt urine in the room and he pushed the bins away and she was there.
the room is stacked up with lotsa bins and stuff so it is not easy to find her.
but the bad news is, she is deteriorating fast. she can no longer stand on her own. she could not even sit up to pee earlier according to the uncle and she just peed lying down. one side of her body was soaked in pee when i saw her earlier. i tried my best to clean her up and lie her on the dry side to let the wet side dry.
she is not eating. but she was still thirsty and drank some with my assistance (lifting her lower body up) but she's completely reliant on me now.
i think it wont be for long. i am estimating 2 or 3 days max for her. her lumps are alot more visible now. she is also not as alert and responsive. she really is deteriorating fast.
sigh.
A good to news to share. Elusive is found! she has been in the room all this while!! would u believe it?? today the uncle smelt urine in the room and he pushed the bins away and she was there.
the room is stacked up with lotsa bins and stuff so it is not easy to find her.
but the bad news is, she is deteriorating fast. she can no longer stand on her own. she could not even sit up to pee earlier according to the uncle and she just peed lying down. one side of her body was soaked in pee when i saw her earlier. i tried my best to clean her up and lie her on the dry side to let the wet side dry.
she is not eating. but she was still thirsty and drank some with my assistance (lifting her lower body up) but she's completely reliant on me now.
i think it wont be for long. i am estimating 2 or 3 days max for her. her lumps are alot more visible now. she is also not as alert and responsive. she really is deteriorating fast.
sigh.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Still missing
left the school at about 6pm today. Elusive was still nowhere to be found.
live in the present, i would remind myself.
yet i cant help but allow a million thoughts race through my mind.
where is Elusive? is she hurt further? has she been picked up by a kind soul who may have taken her to the vet (yet again?)? would that vet ask her to be put down? would that kind soul have agreed? did she get into a fight with the orange tabby (Lion King) who also shares the school? she would not have been able to run fast at all... she could not even walk properly when she came back (limbs sliding out and all..)
is she still alive? pls let her death be a swift one if she is in tremendous suffering right now.
Elusive, Elusive, please show yourself tomorrow first thing in the morning OK? I will give you yummy treats and your favourite wet food.
live in the present, i would remind myself.
yet i cant help but allow a million thoughts race through my mind.
where is Elusive? is she hurt further? has she been picked up by a kind soul who may have taken her to the vet (yet again?)? would that vet ask her to be put down? would that kind soul have agreed? did she get into a fight with the orange tabby (Lion King) who also shares the school? she would not have been able to run fast at all... she could not even walk properly when she came back (limbs sliding out and all..)
is she still alive? pls let her death be a swift one if she is in tremendous suffering right now.
Elusive, Elusive, please show yourself tomorrow first thing in the morning OK? I will give you yummy treats and your favourite wet food.
Elusive is missing
She has escaped from the little room where the 2 guards left her before they went home. I cant imagine her jumping in her state. She must have been in great pain. She is really one tough little cookie, to have been able to make her way up the bins to squeeze through a gap at a height taller than myself and landed on the bins outside the room against the walls.
Where could she be?
Please pray that she'd be fine and appear soon for her meals.
Where could she be?
Please pray that she'd be fine and appear soon for her meals.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Back at home
Elusive is back home (school), back to her favourite Uncle Zain (security guard uncle who has been feeding her for the past 3 years).
She was clearly stressed out when she first came back. Her hind legs seemed to have little strength and she could not walk properly without dragging. Not sure if it is due to the lack of exercise in the tiny space constraints during the hospitalized period or due to her illness or due to the effects of the drugs. Hope some sunshine and more exercise will improve her condition.
Elusive is suspected of having bone cancer. She was brought home today as there was nothing that could be done further for her. I would like to believe that she would have wanted to be home, in her familiar surroundings, if it meant her last moments.
We will do what we can to make her final journey one much filled with love.
She was clearly stressed out when she first came back. Her hind legs seemed to have little strength and she could not walk properly without dragging. Not sure if it is due to the lack of exercise in the tiny space constraints during the hospitalized period or due to her illness or due to the effects of the drugs. Hope some sunshine and more exercise will improve her condition.
Elusive is suspected of having bone cancer. She was brought home today as there was nothing that could be done further for her. I would like to believe that she would have wanted to be home, in her familiar surroundings, if it meant her last moments.
We will do what we can to make her final journey one much filled with love.
The story
Elusive is a stray cat who resides in my school near the main gate. She has lived there for many years, way before I came in. As her name suggests, she has skilfully eluded capture by the pest controllers hired by the school management on many occasions. Her best friend was not so lucky. A manja and trusting one, Elusive's best friend, playmate, was captured and she's been alone ever since.
Elusive trusts only the malay security guard uncle who has been her guardian, giving her food and water for the past 3 years. He has been the only one who is able to go closer to her and even carry her. When I first approached Elusive last July, she would scoot off before I can even say meow.
About 2 weeks ago, I noticed that Elusive has been walking with a painful limp. On closer examination, her left paw was horrendously swollen, almost 4 times the size of her right paw. Her right elbow also looked awkward and swollen. She is suspected of having abscess, pus-filled wound likely brought about after cat fights. I took her to James Tan Veterinary Centre last Saturday, 12/01/08. They found no pus in her and deduced that it was more of a tissue infection that has eaten into her bone. They did an X-ray and found some deformity in the bone where the huge swelling was. They tried adminstering antibiotics and it was to no avail. Her swelling has not gone down but became worse. They have also found more lumps on her back and they were growing at an alarming rate. They could not do anymore for Elusive. They advised that if I wanted to pursue it further I should get her a biopsy at ARC to confirm the cause. They suspect bone cancer. It may cost another several hundreds to get the test done. Whether or not she can eventually recover is also unknown. The total vet fees of todate is approximately $500+.
Ideally, Elusive will definitely be better off in a home where she could be given proper care but it will not be easy to find her a home as she is FIV positive. I do not wish to bring her to a already over-crowded shelter where she may be stressed out or possibly infect other cats. The best I can do for her at this point, is palliative care, to bring her back 'home', that is the school, back to her favourite uncle who is missing her, back to her favourite haunts.
*Elusive at James Tan*
Elusive trusts only the malay security guard uncle who has been her guardian, giving her food and water for the past 3 years. He has been the only one who is able to go closer to her and even carry her. When I first approached Elusive last July, she would scoot off before I can even say meow.
About 2 weeks ago, I noticed that Elusive has been walking with a painful limp. On closer examination, her left paw was horrendously swollen, almost 4 times the size of her right paw. Her right elbow also looked awkward and swollen. She is suspected of having abscess, pus-filled wound likely brought about after cat fights. I took her to James Tan Veterinary Centre last Saturday, 12/01/08. They found no pus in her and deduced that it was more of a tissue infection that has eaten into her bone. They did an X-ray and found some deformity in the bone where the huge swelling was. They tried adminstering antibiotics and it was to no avail. Her swelling has not gone down but became worse. They have also found more lumps on her back and they were growing at an alarming rate. They could not do anymore for Elusive. They advised that if I wanted to pursue it further I should get her a biopsy at ARC to confirm the cause. They suspect bone cancer. It may cost another several hundreds to get the test done. Whether or not she can eventually recover is also unknown. The total vet fees of todate is approximately $500+.
Ideally, Elusive will definitely be better off in a home where she could be given proper care but it will not be easy to find her a home as she is FIV positive. I do not wish to bring her to a already over-crowded shelter where she may be stressed out or possibly infect other cats. The best I can do for her at this point, is palliative care, to bring her back 'home', that is the school, back to her favourite uncle who is missing her, back to her favourite haunts.
*Elusive at James Tan*
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